Good Christians and Bad Christians

I wonder why we, as a people, are just so bad at extending grace when we should be experts at it? As followers of Christ, we've accepted grace and experienced it firsthand. But when it comes to showing grace to our brothers and sisters it sometimes seems like we have no idea what grace even is at all.

I've spent my life in churches. My mom and dad always took me to church when I was a kid. I heard all about Jesus and heaven and peace. I learned the beatitudes and got a shiny plaque. The church people stood up and clapped for me. That was nice.

Somewhere along the way I started learning the difference between "good people" and "bad people." Good people were people who went to church on Sunday. They didn't swear or smoke or go to dances and they never wore bikinis. Bad people had weird hair, dressed funny, smoked and swore. They were bad and we were good. It was our job to make them good. Somehow, somewhere Jesus was involved with the whole equation but I wasn't quite sure how. The most important thing was that people needed to be straightened out.

As I grew and moved from one church to another I learned different definitions for bad people. I met people who told me that other people who I thought were good were really bad because they read the wrong translation of the bible or listened to Christian rock and roll or wore the wrong clothes. That threw me for a loop because I thought that we were all on the same footing because we all believed in Jesus. They told me that some Christians were "being deceived." Apparently there were "good Christians" and "bad Christians." The standards change from place to place.

By time I was in my late teens I had several opportunities to sit on the front lines of some good ole' church brouhahas. Most were in the context of something the adults called "church business meetings." I remember one in particular where a woman did something in the church kitchen that ticked some of the other women off. The fireworks sent sparks everywhere. Man, they were really going at it, calling each other names and using charged words like "corruption", "integrity" and "character." I remember wondering how Jesus fit into the mess.

College hit and, frankly, I was glad to be free of "church." But, by senior year, I decided "church" was probably the right thing to do so my wife and I wandered into a large baptist church near campus. By the next night we had three people in our little living room welcoming us and telling us all about their pastor. I remember one guy telling me, "He's a man's man, He's no pantywaist." That was odd.

We stayed at that church a few weeks and had another visit from some fellas telling Robin and I that we needed to be "re-baptized" in their church and "step up" to membership. I guess we got baptized wrong the first time? It didn't count. We didn't return.

Somehow I knew that Jesus was real in the midst of all the messiness. I had enough brushes with people of grace, people who let things slide and smiled a lot, that I knew I wanted to be like them. They had a peace that comes only through receiving and then giving Grace. They were ambassadors of Jesus. Ambassadors tend not to scream much or forcefully make people submit to their agendas, plans and goals. They represent.

2 Corinthians 5:20 (The Message)
We're Christ's representatives. God uses us to persuade men and women to drop their differences and enter into God's work of making things right between them. We're speaking for Christ himself now: Become friends with God; he's already a friend with you.

I committed my life to being an ambassador and working in ministry. In these past 25 years I have witnessed some terrible carnage in churches. I've seen people fight about rugs and nurseries, soda machines and guitars, street signs and paint. I watched people leave a church body because of the style selected for new auditorium chairs. I've sat in budget meetings where brothers and sisters have fought for an hour about a $250 mission expense and then voted to pass a $5,000 line item for new choir robes without a word of discussion. I often wonder why we fight about the things we fight about. Why do we bear our fangs about so many things that really don't seem to matter much?

Grace is undeserved favor. Grace is about putting others above ourselves. It is about walking the extra mile, turning the other cheek and stepping back from our agendas to consider others. It is about giving the benefit of the doubt. It is about seeing every part's value and even paying special honor to the "less presentable" parts.

Where grace subsides, conflict abounds. Our tongue betrays the true condition of our hearts with hurtful, self-elevating words directed at our brothers and sisters. That rudder steers our ship on the wrong course when it promotes us as "good Christians" and denounces others as "bad Christians."

Where grace fades pharisaism intensifies and fissures multiply.

Represent.

What to do, What to do? (Part 4 - the end)

First and foremost - love God and love others. Love others with an active, you-before-me love. See a need and meet a need.

Second - do what you do and be what you are. Huh???

Paul puts an awesome word picture together in 1 Corinthians 12. He tells us to look at things like we look at our own bodies. It's pretty funny actually. Can you picture if you were just a giant eyeball? Sure, you could see pretty well but you couldn't hear anything or even communicate what you've seen. Or say you're just a big ole mouth ... blah, blah blah. You could talk a lot and hear no one and see nothing. Picture yourself just a hand. Sure, you could give someone a hand but chances are that you would never know that anyone needed a hand in the first place.

I like how he even gets into the parts we can't see. How's your liver? No one even thinks about their liver until it's not doing its job and then everything shutst down.

Are you a good listener? Find a way to listen! Good at teaching? Teach! Feel compelled to pray for people? Dare to pray! Like to organize and make checklists? Do it! Hate being in front of people and prefer to lend a hand behind the scenes? I love you like I love my liver!

Do you get the gist? See what Paul is saying? Let's stop worrying about what we can't do and instead offer what we can. If you're like me, operating in areas where you are not gifted can burn you out fast.

Third, replace yourself.
As a pastor, I have a challenge in front of me. I am supposed to be equipping and training people to do what they do and help them find places to do it. If I do everything myself I am missing the boat and limiting ministry and maybe even missing the point of ministry altogether.

That makes me ask, "Am I replacing myself?" I should be. If I do not offer the people I am discipling the very real opportunity to lead, I am doing little more than filling their gas tanks. When will I hand over the keys and say, "Here, you drive."

Out of love we go.
In going we disciple.
In discipling we equip.
In equipping we prepare.
In preparing we transfer.
In transferring we set free.
In setting free we multiply.
In multiplying we impact more lives.

Teacher, are you replacing yourself by preparing someone to take over?
Pastor, are you training and trusting God enough to hand over the keys?
Worship leader, are you bringing someone alongside to step in and take the reins?
Servant, are you helping someone else learn to serve and stepping aside to let them?

The best (leader) is the one who has sense enough to pick good men to do what he wants done, and self-restraint to keep from meddling with them while they do it.

Theodore Roosevelt

A leader is great, not because of his or her power, but because of his or her ability to empower others. John Maxwell

For many of us, releasing control is the toughest part of leadership. When we do not, our young leaders, feeling like they are not really needed, eventually lose interest and move on leaving us with the ironic exhaustion we've created by never letting them lead or serve. We stunt their growth!

Multiplication is an amazing thing. If you don't believe me try giving me a penny tomorrow and then double it every day for a month. 1 cent, 2 cents, 4 cents and so on. It will be a great lesson using only a bunch of pennies, right?

Go ahead. I double dag dare you.

Love that compells (part 3 of being and doing)

You speak of signs and wonders
I need something other
I would believe if I was able
But I'm waiting on the crumbs from your table
- U2

"What does God want us to do? Just sit around and do nothing?"

Love God. Love your neighbor. Love one another. Love the hurting.

Love is more than a greeting card. It's more than a mushy feeling of infatuation. In biblical context love is usually presented as a verb. Even when presented as a noun, love is the result of action. We have a difficult time comprehending biblical love because we tend to restrict it to the emotional dynamic. We give a hug, smile and say, "I love you."

The movie "How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days" with Kate Hudson and Matthew McConaughey portrays how our society sees love and it makes us laugh at ourselves. But, did you catch the underlying current in that movie? The "l" word is scary. If you want to push someone away in a relationship talk about love, the future and life together. That will send them running!

Parts of our society tries to lessen love. Grandma rocker Tina Turner even calls it a "second hand emotion" and nothing more than an "old fashioned notion." At the same time, shows like The Bachelor parade dozens of attractive women for an eligible male while steeping romance with food, champagne, limousines and luxury all for voyeuristic television audiences who root for true love.

It's clear that we're confused.

The Greek uses a some distinct words for love. I'm not a Greek scholar by any stretch but I do see eros (romantic), phileo (brotherly) and agape (compelling and doing) love. The New Testament uses agape when discussing God's love and our love for Him. Agape is the love of God that compels us to act. It's a deep, deep love that is more about doing than feeling.

In the Hebrew language of the Old Testament we see ahabah (ahav) as a description of the love of God. When referring to God it's an action-based, community, relationship type of meaning that is bathed in commitment, faithfulness and responsibility. It is an identity-swallowing, consuming love that thrills God and benefits others simultaneously. (I invite my linguist readers to help me out with my understanding.)

When Jesus speaks of love it is not just a second-hand emotion. The whole of scripture paints love as a shaping, defining, faithful, protecting, consuming phenomenon. It colors everything about God and everything about His children. The Hebrew presentation of love connects with agape seamlessly.

Godly love compels us to love others. It compels us to see His concern when we look into the eyes of the hungry, the orphan and the single mom. It is the law of God written on every man's heart and the reason the world outside the church looks in with skeptical eyes. They have a sense of what the people of God should be about. It is the reason the jobless man, down on his luck and facing financial disaster, comes through the front doors humbly seeking help.

If we are immersed in discussions of signs and wonders or too busy running from bible study to bible study or chasing after the next adrenaline-pushing worship experience at the expense of the people Jesus lovingly came to rescue, we must step back and look in the James' mirror.

James said that the person who lets the life-changing message of Jesus go in one ear and out the other without acting on it is like a guy who looks in a mirror and walks away forgetting what he looks like. (James 1:22-27) Can you see it? It's like we smile in the mirror, see a big chunk of spinach in our teeth and walk out doing nothing about it. It just doesn't make sense! We can go through the day smiling big and pretty as though there's nothing there but we're kidding ourselves. We can fill our days with religious activities, we can read all the Christian authors, we can journal our daily study of scripture and fill our iPODs with great Christian music but the measure of our understanding of Jesus is seen in our loving others.

What if I really don't love others? What if, truthfully, I really don't care? Should I go out and start doing good things? Please don't. Instead, clear your schedule and rest with God. (Matthew 11:28-30) Hang out with Jesus and let Him teach you. Let your doing come from your loving and being loved by God.

"We cannot work for God without love. It is the only tree that can produce fruit on this sin-cursed earth, that is acceptable to God. If I have no love for God nor for my fellow man, then I cannot work acceptably." - DL Moody

Being and Doing (part 2)

My last post on the foundational importance of being rather than doing has brought some interesting questions. Thinking is a good thing.

Doers have been offended. As a doer, I understand that. We perfectionists place a lot of value in our commitments to excellence. We like our Daytimers and empty calendars present a challenge to be filled. A full calendar, we believe, shows that we are busy and important people. I confess, I like lists. I like to check tasks off my list. I will even add an already completed task to my list for the joy of drawing a line through it to mark it completed. Being a doer puts me in control. I like measurable goals. It's the way I work.

The trouble comes when I start placing more value in my doing stuff for God than I put on spending time with God. God created me and you to be in relationship with Him. It's His priority. It's His love. It's what we see in the famous Mary verses Martha conflict when Jesus came to visit (Luke 10:40-42).

I can identify with Martha. I can really feel for her. While she's busy doing things to make her guests comfortable, Mary plops down on the floor to hang out with Jesus. I can picture Mary making herself comfortable, smiling and listening to Jesus. Martha is getting more and more steamed by the minute. I can imagine her possible thought process, "What does she think she's doing? She knows there is stuff to do? How can she just be sitting there?"

It's important to understand the historical context of the time period. Women were not welcomed to sit at the feet of a rabbi. In most circles it was forbidden. Women were servants who worked hard. Sadly, they were often seen more as property than people. And here we see Mary sitting at Jesus's feet! Martha knows that her sister is well aware of what is allowable and what is not. This whole situation is just not allowable!

The revolutionary Jesus who routinely upset the religious leaders welcomed women and children and Samaritans and Gentiles is at it again. He touched lepers. He went to tax collectors' houses. He valued people not for status, position, education, wealth or bloodline. He valued all people because, as I said in the last post, they are created in the image of God and He is very, very fond of them. Jesus comes to Mary's defense saying she has chosen better to sit with Jesus. (He is not saying Martha should have dropped everything but that she is more than likely going overboard at the expense of what is truly important.)

Remember the criminals hanging on crosses? One mocked Jesus hanging near him and the other defended Jesus. He told the first criminal to back off (Luke 23:39-43) and admitted that both he and the other deserved to die but insisted that Jesus was innocent. Then, this guy who has absolutely nothing to offer, this guy who will be dead in a matter of hours asks Jesus to remember Him in Heaven. And Jesus says yes!

Why, on earth, would Jesus say yes to this guy? Why would He tell him that he would be in paradise with Him? The truth is, on earth, there is no rationale to explain this. The rationale is supernatural and beyond our earth system. Our earthly system says you are valuable because of what you do and what you contribute. God's system of grace says you are valuable because He created you in His image and has a gift that you cannot earn. You cannot do enough. It is the reason an unworthy criminal hanging on a cross, about to die, is valued the same as the missionary, a worship leader or pastor. Our value is not in our doing, it is in our being.

Does that make you mad? Sometimes it bugs me that the person I determine "scum" is not scum to my Father. Of course, God must see me as better than that scum, right? The Truth is without Jesus, I'm in no better shape.

It's like couterfeit money. If you take a really good counterfeit $100 bill into a shop and an ugly, cheap, counterfeit $100 bill made on a color copier, it will be clear that one bill looks better than the other. Both are worthless. Someone might even admire the better counterfeit. The value of each bill is the same. Zero. The value in currency is the treasury that backs it.

Placing our value in anything other than the unshakeable truth that we are loved by God, having been created in His image and then restored to relationship with Him through the price paid by Jesus, is a mistake. Pointing to all our doings is a mistake.

Does that mean we drop out of everything? Does it mean it is useless to do anything? Yes and no. Yes, if we are overloading ourselves and burning out because we believe that it somehow changes our value in God's eyes. No, if you are operating out of a place of peace and rest where you serve from a place of relationship with your Father. If we are serving at the expense of relationships in our lives or are so busy doing "God things " that we have no time left to love our neighbors, we are missing it. If we are too busy to sit by the lake and enjoy His creation, too busy to laugh with an old friend in an overpriced coffee shop and too busy to paint a sunset, our lives are filled with too much noise to hear His still small voice.

"Step out of the traffic! Take a long, loving look at me, your High God, above politics, above everything." (Ps. 46:10 The Message)

If our churches fill our schedules so much that we do not have time to coach a Little League team, serve on the school board or host a cookout for our neighbors, they cut us off from the very people with whom we should be building relationships. Since we have no time to love the people next door we expand the definition of loving our neighbors to all those who are in our church. Are are missing the point? I believe we are.

Our value is our in our being - created in God's image with a desire that we be in relationship with Him. His desire is that we talk with Him, sit with Him and walk with Him and enjoy His company. When we begin here we become more like Him, our hearts and character reflect Him and then ... we find ourselves doing.

We'll discuss the doing in the next entry. I bet you can hardly wait, right?

"Humble yourself and cease to care what men think. A meek man is not a human mouse afflicted with a sense of his own inferiority. Rather,... he has stopped being fooled about himself. He knows well that the world will never see him as God sees him and he has stopped caring. He has obtained a place of soul rest. The old struggle to defend himself is over. - A. W. Tozer