NYWC Big Room 3 - Donald Miller notes

Donald Miller

STORY
Character who wants someting and overcomes conflict to get it

A sense-making device

The best way to teach Anything is thru narrative. The bible is narrative after narative. Not a point by point formula.

Friend telling fishing story. Wait can I ask you something? What do the fish represent? What do I get out of this story?

What if life isn't meaningless? What if just YOUR life is meaningless?

Good story. Imperfect protaganist is key. Good story requires protaganist sacrificing for benefit of another. Success doesn't matter in life. In good story there is connection with sacrificing character. Character is defined by action. What you want is a maningful story.

Character who does not want something meaningful is not a good story. Donald: What are my goals?

- resource the church to father the fatherless

Scarey. Raises conflict. Triggers emotion. Conflict is the only way character changes - strenghtens, changes, learns.

Act 3 climax. Make conflict seem to go away. Frodo throws the ring into the fire.

God-shaped whole filled by Jesus completes us and is Act 3 climax promises end to conflict? Not true. Not biblical. Conflict remains. Imagine Paul doing info-mmercial???

Act 3 climax takes place at wedding feast of the Lamb in our lives. We are in Act 2 slogging through "naming the animals" like Adam before Eve.

Danish people happiest because they have low expectations - according to 60 minutes.

If we expect conflict we will not be surprised and devestated by it - Act 3 climax comes at the wedding feast of the lamb

By sharing Story, we share life and support. We strenghten. We walk together and navigate conflict of Act 2.

What STORY am I living? Sharing?

Parenting in the Real World

www.realworldparents.com

Listen to the news, read the papers and it's easy to come to the conclusion that the adolescent world is in steady decline. We think that more teens are having sex, more are committing violent crimes, more are committing suicide, more are using drugs, smoking or binge drinking. Right? Wrong, according to Mark Matlock of Real World Parents.

It's no wonder that parents are discouraged! Because media has to sell papers or boost viewership they must provide stories that attract attention. The YOUtube video of teenagers pummeling each other plays at the top of every 15 minute segment. The story of the eighth grader carrying a knife in his backpack is on page one of the local paper while the news of 16 National Merit Scholars is buried on page 5 in 9 point type.

Real World Parents provides a summary of stats showing that while things are bad they are really no worse than they were 30 years ago. That's not great news but at least it is better news than what we perceive to be true.

RWP provides parents with training and resources that help them build stronger families. Visit www.realworldparents.com .

If you are at the NYWC, be sure to look for Mark Matlock and plug into RWP seminars. You'll be glad you did.

Who do you say that I am?

Youth worker, who do you say that I am?

You are Christ, the filler of my weekends.

You are Jesus, compelling me to attend meeting upon meeting.

You are Jesus who keeps me from taking vacations with my family because of the next mission trip, camp or event.

You are the Christ who presses me to get the newsletter done.

You are Jesus who demands the buzzwords of "excellence" and "leadership."

You are Christ who returns me to my home day after day with barely enough energy to find the remote and flop on my couch.

You are Jesus who puts me in positions where parents blame me whenever their kids screw up.

You are the Christ who causes my mind to race from worry to worry each night while sleep evades me.

You are Jesus who keeps me from exercise and play by making me too busy working for you.

You are the Christ who keeps me from deep relationships.

Somehow, somewhere we know these things are not Jesus, but our daily planners reveal our true beliefs.

What does your life say about how you answer Jesus when he asks, "Who do you say that I am?"

Slow down, be quiet and rest with Jesus for your strength.

Shhhhhh...

A trip to the well at NYWC

I've been doing my best sucking this straw with everything I have trying get every last drop from a cup that has not been refilled in a few years. Maybe you know the feeling? The slurping is loud and pretty gross. My cup has been bone dry for awhile.

I've been doing my best to take some drinks here and there. Books. Podcasts. Flipping the pages of my bible echoes my dryness with each crinkle of the paper. But, it's been awhile since I've been able to go to the well.

The National Youth Workers Convention has been a great well for me over these past 25 years in youth work. It has gone through significant changes and, truthfully, I do miss the old days of several hundred of us eating around tables and listening to a couple wild rebels; Wayne Rice and Mike Yaconelli. Yac made me cry year after year. They were soul-watering tears that washed away the negative attitudes and reminded me of my calling to reach teenagers to introduce them to Jesus. I wept when Mike died.

But the Lord was not done with us. In stepped Tic and Marko. They weren't my rabbis like Mike was but they carried a vision for student ministry. The tears revisited each year I saw additional growth and more and more youth workers gathering to drink from the well. Hotel ballrooms were replaced by giant convention centers, multiple cities and more and more resources.

Here I sit at the edge of the well again. Things will begin tomorrow. Tic and Marko are gone and I am an old timer now and won't know many people beyond Duffy, Chap, Tony ... but with me are three guys who work with our students back home. I've brought them to the well and can't wait to see them drink their fill. They'll come back to our room with bags of resources and new excitement for our students. They don't know what this well used to mean to me. It is brand new for them.

Breathe deep ... drink to excess ... return to ministry reminded of who you work for and revell in the fact that He really doesn't care where you parked the church van.

Need to save some money?

Who doesn't? The Elm St. Deli across form the Hyatt has giant salads and good sandwiches that won't sink your budget.

Look for CVS and Walgreens on Race Street at the 6th Street intersection. Water, Soda, snacks.

Dominos delivery - 513-471-3733 says it will deliver to Convention Center area.

Campanello's Italian Restaurant - 414 Central AvenueCincinnati, Ohio 45202 (513) 721-9833 - we ate lunch there and the food was good. Main dishes in the $6-$9 range for lunch. http://www.campanellos.com/

Quiznos, Chik-fil-a, Subway on West 4th Street between Vine and Elm.

I ain't no bible scholar but I do like the author

"I know the Bible and all that it says..."

Wow. Really? That's awesome. I'm far from that.

I read the comment on my iPhone screen in the midst of a couple Christians smacking each other around with the bible on Facebook. One of them is convinced she is voting with God and the other is convinced that she is the one voting with God even though their votes and opinions are opposite on the same issue. One was tossing around words like "judging" and doing the familiar "by voting against this you are judging people" argument. The other was sticking to "sacred" things and speaking for God. Whack! Smack! Bam! Pow! (like the old Batman and Robin series)

I dared venture into the debate on philosophical grounds. Why not take a stab at this "judgment" viewpoint? Does voting against something equal judgement? Are there different levels of judgement? Where are we headed with this topic? If I vote against something does it mean I instantly hate all those who support it?

If it does I must confess that if you use a cellphone when you drive, I hate you. I know you see it as your right and like a New Hampshirite you want to "live free or die" but I just don't want it impacting me. Go ahead, live free, just don't kill me in the process! Yeah, selfish, I know. So, if I can vote that you get a steep fine for blabbing on your phone while driving, I'm gonna do it. Sorry. It's the way I think. I'm a cellphone bigot. I'm also a cellphone hypocrite ... because I have one and have used it while driving. I'm a bigot, hypocrite who is going to vote to pass judgement on you! Eek. Harsh, huh?

Well, the truth is, I can't judge you. I'm not a judge. In fact, my friend who knows the Bible and all it says should know that it says there is only one judge between God and man. We could all get together and vote people outta heaven if that weren't true. We can vote however we want but it doesn't change a thing where "The Judge" is concerned.

We do make numerous judgements every day but they have no impact on Judgement. When we go into the voting booth we make decisions about candidates, taxes, policy and people. We also make judgments about what to eat, where to work out, what to wear and what to watch.

When we judge someone to be a deceived God-hater and bigot because they disagree with us, we cannot disallow them the same right to judge us as God-hating, sinners who have been deceived. Judgement is messy business. Frankly, I'm glad it's not my job.

To be honest, goverments and politics fascinate me. Our American system lets us vote. Most of the world doesn't have that luxury. God is still God regardless of the crazed dictator, the corrupt politician and the religious extremist. In some parts of the world women have to have their faces covered and are forbidden from education. Some parts of the world kill people for sleeping around. Yeah, that's harsh. But, God is still God regardless of what people do.

When I pull the curtain and step into the voting booth, I have judgements to make. Choices. Decisions. Every oval I fill in, if it were to become public knowlege, would make people angry with me. If I vote against healthcare I hate poor people, if I vote for gay marriage I hate Jesus, if I vote against gay marriage I hate gays and Jesus, if I vote for limiting taxes I hate children and our schools. Wow. I'm glad there's a curtain behind me.

I'm not telling you how I am going to vote. If you call my house and take a poll to try to get me to tell you, I promise you only that I am going to make up all kinds of strange answers for you that will make you scratch your head. "So you're a gay, asian, high school dropout making $250,000 a year voting against gay marriage?" Yupp, that's me.

The Bible tells me about this guy named David. The king, an evil guy, wanted him dead and tried to hunt him down. At one point David was cowering in a cave when the king, hot on his trail, came in to relieve himself. While the king was there squatting in the dark, David had the perfect chance to kill him but he didn't. Instead he said, "Who am I to raise a hand against God's annointed (or, the guy God allowed to be in this position)?"

I'll vote doing my best to make what I think is the right choice. I'll do my best to make decisions that are in line what I believe the Bible teaches, if it has anything to say that relates to the question at hand.

But, I confess, even though I am a pastor who has spent my life learning from scripture, I cannot pretend to be like my friend who says she "knows the bible and all it teaches." If I knew it all, I'd have no further use for it. Instead, I still find strength and wisdom for life in its pages every single day.

Regardless of the outcome of any vote I will continue to value people and do my best to show them love by inviting them to follow Christ. Why? I think it's what Jesus would do.

Jesus straightened up and asked her, "Woman, where are they? Has no one condemned you?" "No one, sir," she said. "Then neither do I condemn you," Jesus declared. "Go now and leave your life of sin." John 8:10-11

My magic discipleship wand is broken ...

You've seen the bulletin announcements. They go like this, "Sign up for our exciting discipleship classes today at the information center in the foyer." Hmmm ...

Discipleship classes? I almost think that's almost an oxymoron. Classes, in the form we are all used to, spoon out information. I've taken plenty of classes in my life. Most of them consisted of someone lecturing while I scribbled notes to prepare to pass a test. I've taken online classes, college classes, DVD classes and some hands-on classes. Most of them have been pretty helpful. Some have been as painful as eating glass. I remember felt-covered boards in Sunday school classes long ago and getting yelled at for turning a fair-skinned, glowing Jesus upside down like he was standing on his head on the water instead of walking on it. I thought it was funny but my teacher thought it was blasphemous and she let me know. At length. Loudly.

But then there's this word "discipleship." A disciple is more than a learner. A disciple is a follower who puts teachings into practice. It is a relationship-based term. When you read scripture you quickly see that Jesus' disciples were not copious note-takers stressing about upcoming exams. They wanted to know Jesus, not just know about Him.

If you've been going to church for a long time, I bet you know a lot about Jesus. I bet you excel in bible trivia games and always get the bible questions right when you watch jeopardy. Me too. It feels pretty good. That is, it feels good until someone else knows the name of the high priest servant who got his ear sliced off in the garden and I don't. Man, then I feel like a loser when my Christian friends give me that down-the-nose look that says, "you should know that!" (It's Malchus, by the way.)

Classes are good. Bible study is good. But, apart from relationship and sharing life with others, we risk missing the point of what Jesus came to say. Boiled down to its very simplest form - God loves us, God gave us Jesus, we trust and we get a whole new view of what life is meant to be. It's called "Good News." A new beginning. Life.

This path of following Jesus is not meant to be walked alone. I dare you to plug in with a group of Christ-followers who are more concerned with becoming like Jesus than they are with filling in all the blanks in their workbooks.

Get together outside of Sunday service, eat, laugh loud, praise, worship, enjoy the kids, relax and talk about what God is doing. Share life. Share resources. Share struggles and pray. Do it and I bet the same thing will happen as happened in Acts 2:46-47 - people will like what they see and people will be changed.

Discipleship takes time. There's no magic wand that will speed up the process. If there is, it's broken.

It's the people, stupid!

In 1992, as Bill Clinton campaigned for the presidency, his focus statement was drilled into the staff members at every campaign office to ensure that everyone stayed on target; “It’s the economy, stupid.”

In ministry we would do well to hang a similar banner on the wall of every church office. Our biblical message should remind each of us that “it’s the people, stupid!” Unfortunately that message is often pushed out by long task lists, conflicts, endless meetings and the demands of facilities. More and more pastors are adopting a CEO model of leadership to accomplish their goals and meet their increasing responsibilities while people move in and out of their churches without making meaningful, discipling relationships.

I don't like the terminology of leadership books that label people as “assets.” I get the point but it just seems like friends we love change into something else when we see them as assets that help us meet our goals. It's impersonal.

Several years ago a local celebrity in our area came through the front doors of our church. On Monday morning every person in the outer office mentioned his presence to me before I reached my office. At staff meeting the senior pastor talked of what a great thing it would be for the church if we could get he and his family plugged in. The next night he was mentioned at the deacons’ meeting. He was a definite “asset” as a public figure. The other 6 visitors we had that same morning were never even mentioned. They got the standard welcome letter and information packet in the mail that week. Our TV celebrity stayed two or three weeks and then left as quickly as he came. We later found out that he went to every local church and attended a few weeks to connect with his audience. Our attenders were his assets.

Jesus paints a clear picture of interacting with people. We should value them, commit to them, model integrity and honesty and invite them to follow Jesus with us.

I love the people on my team. People never care how much I know unless they know how much I care. After they have gone through some leadership orientation sessions, completed the church-required paperwork and begin getting involved, I love developing relationships with each of them. It's a challenge with 35 people. I only wish I could dedicate more of my time to being with them. But you know how it goes ... there's a meeting at 3:00 to choose the color of the new chairs and I've got to be there.

Who do you have on your "team?" Each of them, like you and me, love encouragement and praise. Little things like text messages asking how they are or telling them you prayed for them today go a long way. Sharing meals together, watching ballgames, having family game nights all help us truly connect.

A group of us just returned from our annual retreat where we do nothing but play and pray in a gorgeous Maine foliage setting. It is a weekend of rest, playing golf, breaking bread and building relationships. The spontaneous conversations we have are always much more on target than the planned sessions that consume our other meetings. We lean on each other, guide each other, speak truth and share what God is teaching us. It's my favorite weekend of the year.

I don't have "assets" but I am sharpened and refreshed by a group of partners in the gospel (Phil. 1). We know we can share our weaknesses as easily as our strengths. We value each other and are open to creative new ideas because we continuously reevaluate and put sacred cows to death. We support each other knowing we are safe and loved. We share in ministry together. We're friends.

And the cool thing is, each of these friends of mine are taking what we do together and putting it into action with groups of their own. That's multiplication.

"I no longer call you servants, because a servant does not know his master's business. Instead, I have called you friends, for everything that I learned from my Father I have made known to you." - Jesus, John 15:15

The Holy Spirit Procrastinates?

I'm confused again. Yeah, I know that it happens a lot. Here's the deal today...

I've got some "spirit-filled" friends. They call themselves that anyway. It's usually said with a hint of "we-got-something-you-don't" tone that makes it clear that I've not arrived. I'm just a little bit short of them. I'm like the kid in the remedial reading group in elementary school; I think I read fine but all the other kids smirk that I'm not on the same books as they are. I don't care for it.

But that's another topic for another day. Today's confusion is the result of my "spirit-led" brothers operating in what I call "wing-it mode." They are allergic to planning and preparation and lean heavily on doing whatever the Spirit leads them to do. Um, okay.

I wonder why the Spirit can't show up in the planning process. Can't he help us put messages together or design programs? My wing-it friends don't seem to think so. They accuse me of being controlling and not open to the Spirit's leading.

My experience has put me right in the middle of some weird stuff. Once the Spirit led the pastor to stop in his sermon and tell the crowd, "God wants to heal someone of a pain in their wrist today." Hmmm

I saw another occassion when a guy told his congregation they were not worthy of receiving communion. Then there are the times when I've seen guys toss their notes aside to preach a message that God just gave them at the last minute. Those messages, in my experience, were all scattered, disjointed and tough to follow.

At one service I attended, a man stood up and announced that he had a message from the Lord. He went on a verbal rant about women until the pastor stopped him after several minutes. Weird.

I'm pretty sure that the Holy Spirit can and does show up in planning. I think the "Spirit-led" mentality is often an excuse for laziness.

I'm polluted

It's late ... or early. It all depends on your perspective I suppose. For me, it's very late. I've normally been asleep for about 2 and a half hours by now. Not tonight. Stuffy nose. Scratchy throat. Pesky cough. Some little bug found its way into my body and is now having a party making more and more bug buddies. Like upstairs neighbors hootin' and hollerin' with the resounding thump of hip-hoppery, this little virus that moved into my sinuses sometime around Wednesday and is keeping me from sleep.

I ain't no high-falutin' scientist or biology guy, but from what I understand, some germ is now waging war with my imune system. It's something about cell division and white blood cells and ... blah, blah, blah. I'm simple. I understand it like Alien. My body, the ship, has been invaded by outsiders who want to take it down. So, the crew is running around like crazy, screaming and yelling and firing their lazers at the pests. No wonder my head aches ... it's all that yelling and it's the lazers bouncing off the walls of my sinuses. When the good guys hit the bad guys the bad guys go down in explosions and bursts of flame. Yeah, that's exactly what's going on. Darn pollutants.

Pollutants ruin things. It seems like a simple concept to grasp. You aren't going to pull up to a bar and say, "Pollutants. Shaken, not stirred." And I bet that you wouldn't reach into the cooler at the grocery store avoiding pure spring water for the gray tinted water advertising, "Now with 20% more pollutants."

Okay, here's the pitch, the skinny, the lowdown, the point ...

There was this guy named James who lived about 2000 years ago. His brother was a big deal. He hung out with him a lot; they were very close. James was into the same stuff his brother was. In fact his brother gave him purpose and changed his life. His brother was Jesus.

If you don't really know much of Jesus outside of the freak show you've seen while flipping through cable stations, you will probably be surprised by reading about his life in Matthew, Mark, Luke and John. I like His style. He had a lot to say about organized religion and what God is really like.

Jesus brought an entirely new paradigm onto the scene. He pointed out God's love, His heart and His motivation. He welcomed the poor in spirit and loved people that society didn't love. He changed their lives and invited them to trust His father who really was for them.

Society thought one way and Jesus offered another. It was entirely different from what the guys in the fancy robes where demanding allegiance to. It was a different mindset - one that said, "Hey, God is for you regardless of who you are or what you've done."

There have always been a lot of things that have polluted that message and complicated it. Some pollutants have obscured it totally and kept people from seeing God's heart. James recognized that tons of things get in the way so he summed up the message of his brother again:

"Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world." James 1:27

The germs, the pollutants, I have partying in my body right now are robbing my energy and keeping me from health. The pollutants James talks about party it up and keep us from recognizing God and his heart. They drag us down and take us out. They make us lose sight of the fact that God is for us.

God is for you.